Can we talk about this? It has been on my mind lately. We get going and we are doing amazing. We feel amazing and we know we are on the right track. We are making healthy choices and then something happens and we make choices that are contrary to the life we desire to be living.
Why do we do this? I have a few thoughts, for me it comes down to a few things.
First, we fall back on childhood insecurities. I saw a few eye rolls, but bear with me here. As parents we spend a lot of time correcting behavior, no doubt our parents spent just as much time doing it as we do. We all know parents aren’t perfect and maybe as children we heard things like “you’re so lazy” “why can’t you just get this right?” “You don’t deserve that” “why can’t you be like your sister, she is doing it right”. Or maybe we felt shame or embarrassed when we embraced our beautiful true nature and others mocked us. While we have consciously forgotten those statements that we may have heard, our subconscious hasn’t. In times of progress a part of us looks for reasons why we don’t deserve to be happy and healthy and those thoughts come back in full force. They come back and believe them.
Second, we may have grown up in an environment where our adult role models talked negatively about themselves and we learned those patterns from them. Perhaps we caught our mother frowning at herself in the mirror. Or heard a teacher wonder out loud why she was eating another cookie because it wasn’t doing anything to help her thunder thighs. We could have also seen an older sibling criticize themselves about not being good enough or smart enough and compare themselves to others. It isn’t too much of a stretch to believe that we heard those thoughts and internalized them. Those thoughts can resurface and throw us off our game.
(Please note, it is so important we do our best to avoid doing these things as adults. We want to be examples of good healthy self-talk to the children in our lives.)
Third, our bodies are so used to living an unhealthy lifestyle that they just aren’t comfortable being in a healthy and happy space. The healthy food and exercise act like foreign matter and our bodies don’t know how to deal with it all. So we take a step back and return to unhealthy habits. Habits that make us feel comfortable and safe.
So how do we fight the self-sabotage when it starts? It all starts with creating healthy thought patterns to fight against the negative ones. Remember our “I am” statements?
“I am enough!” “I am worthy!” “I am deserving!” “I am amazing!” “I am a sexy beast!”
We feel silly doing them, but they work! If we say them enough they get down deep into that same subconscious level and work at pushing those negative thoughts out. How do we help our bodies feel comfortable living a healthier life? We keep pushing. Eventually our bodies will acclimate and we will feel comfortable living a happy and healthy life.
“We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.” – – Albert Einstein
It can be so hard rewriting these negative thoughts. It takes time and a lot of hard work. Even when we think we have it figured out we might be surprised by a slump that comes out of left field. Or perhaps a trial or change comes our way and works hard to stir up those old thought patterns. Stay strong. Keep doing the little things and those will lead to the big things. And number one…don’t beat yourself up!! We have talked about it before. Forgive yourself, always!! Don’t give up, keep working!! You are worth it and you do deserve it!! You are beautiful and you are enough!!
Jen “Hotmess Hottie”